i have tried so long and so hard with this. [rennes]
i'm worried it might be time to throw in the towel soon.
there have been too many fails. i have stood up after falling so many times only to say it's going to make me stronger, but i don't know if i can stand up anymore.
i'm sorry this is vague. i know i shouldn't talk about the "hard times" in a public space. but it is really really hard right now.