i've seen it all

I keep thinking as I get older I will relate less and less to music in that way we do when we're young - in that obsessive way where we think lyrics were written about us - how it can feel really personal. In the kind of way that you'd be embarrassed now to talk about and deny that you still do. Dancer in the Dark always used to make me tear up a bit, but now it's hard to even watch it.

In the next few days I may (or may not) begin treatment for the growing blind areas in my eyes. I'm scared, nervous, and can't focus on anything I'm supposed to be doing. I try so hard to be positive, but sometimes it's just plain hard, especially when there is not a clear path ahead of you.