rennes

3.07.2011

i've seen it all



I keep thinking as I get older I will relate less and less to music in that way we do when we're young - in that obsessive way where we think lyrics were written about us - how it can feel really personal. In the kind of way that you'd be embarrassed now to talk about and deny that you still do. Dancer in the Dark always used to make me tear up a bit, but now it's hard to even watch it.

In the next few days I may (or may not) begin treatment for the growing blind areas in my eyes. I'm scared, nervous, and can't focus on anything I'm supposed to be doing. I try so hard to be positive, but sometimes it's just plain hard, especially when there is not a clear path ahead of you.

20 comments:

erica said...

so sorry to hear about your eyes. it seems like my eyesight gets worse and worse as i get older. for those of us who rely on sight for our livelihood, it's scary to think that we could go blind. i really hope they're able to help preserve your eyesight, julia!

jennifer said...

I'll be sending good thoughts your way, Julia. I hope the treatment is successful. Be strong and stay positive!

sarah said...

i listened to this ted talk the other day. it made me feel okay about feeling lost sometimes. (yes, the title is a a little intense)
http://www.ted.com/talks/steve_jobs_how_to_live_before_you_die.html

sending you all my hope + best wishes. xo.

Laura said...

Sending good thoughts your way- I hope everything turns out ok.

metrode said...

good luck with this, Julia

jenny gordy said...

oh julia, i'm sorry. i am keeping you in my thoughts and hoping for the best for you. this is an honest and touching post.

Yoshie Hozumi said...

I'm always here for you and will hold your hand! Sending good vibrations for your lovely eyes, Jaina.
:)))))

Ruth said...

Wow, I hope you do start treatment. good luck! That sounds terribly hard to deal with, I would give you a hug if I knew you in real life...but I cannot, so I will pray for you and wish you well.

Jennifer said...

Oh Julia, I'm thinking of you during this difficult time. I can't imagine how frightening it must be for you, and will keep you in my thoughts. Best wishes for a successful treatment and prognosis. :) xo

anabela / fieldguided said...

Oh, Julia, I hope it goes well. xo

said...

really sorry to hear this. keep going, you can only take things as they come.

Shirley said...

I wish you all the best with the treatment. I cannot imagine what you must be going through. It does sound scary and I'm sure you're not along in feeling that way. I hope everything turns out well for you.

Bre said...

sending you my love!!

Kim said...

Julia, I'm thinking a thousand good thoughts for you. You are so brave to share about this. I love you, my friend!

anja louise verdugo said...

I really hope it goes well... adding positive vibes to the bunch. Take it easy when you need to!

elena gold said...

oh sending you best best wishes. this must be so scary. here's to a clear path ahead. x.

Kristien said...

Julia, I am so sorry to hear about your eyesight. I can only imagine how scared you must be. Being able to see, and see well, even if you need glasses or contacts, is something you just take for granted. Losing your sight is a terrifying prospect. I don't know what your eye condition is, but my mother in law's good friend has been living with macular degeneration for years, and she recently climbed the Inca Trail to Machu Picchu. I mention this anecdote only to say that sometimes these things progress slowly, and in the meantime there is whole lot of life out there to explore...and many beautiful bags to create! Sending you good thoughts for health.

jen said...

so sorry to hear about this, sending all the best thoughts your way!

abby said...

I have been thinking about you Julia. Wishing the best for your vision. I read this post last night but did not have a chance to comment. You were on my mind many times today. It really touched me, and to think about how that would be to really be faced with losing my vision. I wear glasses and it's frustrating to have slow and gradual vision loss, but I have never really worried about blindness. Such a huge thing, especially for such a visually creative person. I hope you are able to find the right treatment. Sending a virtual comforting hug!

EvaForeva said...

I will be thinking happy thoughts Julia. I hope everything goes well. Take time to relax too, ok?
xoxo